Woman recounts sexual abuse in trial against famous musician Miguel Del Pópolo
Feeling trapped, I viewed myself as small and helpless as I never experienced such fear. Amid those harrowing moments, I realized all the girls he mentioned likely faced the same danger I faced. For a long time, I experienced the humiliations Del Popolo inflicted on me each time I undressed to bathe or change.
- 2 weeks ago
November 7, 2024
Mailén Frías, who works in sound production and studies industrial design, courageously exposed the abuse she suffered from her partner, inspiring a movement against violence in the music industry. | Photo courtesy of Julianite Calcagno
TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains content about the details of sexual assault and may not be suitable for some readers.
BUENOS AIRES, Argentina — Eight years ago, I experienced sexual violence and abuse. Although I moved forward and overcame numerous obstacles, the after-effects still lingered. Today, I am finally wrapping up the judicial process against an abuser, forcing me to relive those horrific memories constantly.
Throughout the hearings, vivid nightmares pulled me back into those painful moments. Yet, this legal process is essential to hold my abuser accountable and ensure that his harm to me and other girls does not go unpunished.
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Young woman encounters sexual abuse in relationship
As a teenager, I often failed to recognize the conflicts in my relationships. At 15, I became pregnant and gave birth to a baby. When I met Del Popolo, a prominent musician in Buenos Aires, I ignored the warning signs of his abusive nature. I became his friend and confidant, listening to his stories about girls, some underage, whom he claimed harassed him. With no doubt, I trusted his words.
Eventually, we had sex, sometimes consensually and other times in an abusive manner without my awareness. Once, when I consumed excessive alcohol, I felt sick. He approached me under the guise of helping and then escorted me to the apartment where we stayed. While the band toured, I would visit them, and we would lie down to sleep. Without my consent, he would begin to penetrate me, exploiting my vulnerability while I remained unaware. It felt as if a veil obscured my ability to see the truth.
One day, despite my refusal, he forced me to have sex, pushing me to my breaking point. He unleashed severe violence I never faced from anyone before, leaving me bewildered. This man, whom I considered a friend, seemed to revel in my fear and suffering. In the darkness, as I cried, he reached for my face and touched my tears, which only seemed to excite him further. He hit me and pinned me down, leaving me unable to scream due to the shock.
After years of fear and trauma, woman confronts her rapist in court
Feeling trapped, I viewed myself as small and helpless as I never experienced such fear. Amid those harrowing moments, I realized all the girls he mentioned likely faced the same danger I faced. For a long time, I experienced the humiliations Del Popolo inflicted on me each time I undressed to bathe or change.
Soon, I realized nearly every sexual encounter felt strange; he derived pleasure from humiliating me. As a result, I could neither work nor leave my house. Often, I could not wait for the bus in public spaces or enter noisy places, as certain types of noise felt unbearable to me. Relentlessly, fear pursued me. Grappling with confusion, I questioned how someone I trusted and cared for could hurt me so deeply. This paralysis persisted for many years until depression finally engulfed me in 2022. Promptly, I sought psychiatric treatment, which I continue to this day.
This year, I attended the hearings for the trial I initiated against my rapist, confronting him after eight years. One morning in the court, I encountered him just a few meters away. Hearing his voice and witnessing his gestures revived memories I managed to forget. As those moments resurfaced, they pulled me back to the time of our interactions. Anguish enveloped me, shaking me to my core. Nevertheless, amidst the turmoil, I recognized my transformation. I became bolder, no longer the vulnerable and manipulated girl he once knew.
Struggling with lingering trauma, woman seeks justice and a brighter future
The legal proceedings moved me deeply. As I heard other victims share their stories of abuse during adolescence, I reflected on my own experiences at the same age, considering my 16-year-old son. When I see him and his friends, I cannot fathom how anyone could abuse someone so young. Immediately, sorrow overwhelms me and my nightmares resurge. Sometimes they are explicit, while at other times they do not directly relate to my rape. Yet, I always experience the same sensations of humiliation, disgust, and pain. I wake up trembling and distressed as these thoughts linger all day, hindering my daily routine.
To keep my life on track, I develop strategies to leave my house and go to work, but it feels exhausting. Frequently, I cry, questioning why this man still evokes such emotions in me. I do not want to keep crying over this. Frustration engulfs me as I continue to feel the pain. However, I believe I am in the final stretch. Once authorities convict him, I will no longer remember the painful memories. At last, I will feel relieved to close this chapter and know he will face punishment for his harm.
At the same time, I feel pity for the person I once loved and considered a friend. I struggle to accept the harm coming to him, yet I believe that prisons fail to reform rapists. Although it is challenging to see this as a solution, it is the only way to bring closure. Despite everything, I feel hopeful and calm. Today, I connect better with others and choose the right people, knowing who I do not want in my life. Now, I can build healthy relationships and live a different life.
